My Heart’s Desire
by Andrea Michelle
My muse, my brotha, my Mahogany Brown
My Black Atlas Man, standing there
with your shoulders strained under the weight of the world upon them
Let me lighten your load, recall your memory, take you way back when
To the very beginning
To where we first met on the banks of the Nile
Remember when you rubbed my feet with anointed oil?
And soothed my sun burned skin?
and told me I was yours for a lifetime?
We lay together and birthed a civilization
it and our love was the envy of all that beheld it
Nothing mattered but you and me
we: The Original People
Through jungle and ancient metropolis you provided for me
and our offspring spread far and wide
Though your mighty spear was no match for their foreign magic
you maintained your faith
Over seas and under cargo we went, separately but with united spirits
Chained to you, I jumped overboard
into the darkest waters my soul had ever seen
Because I knew, with you, I would somehow be free
although my body was broken and bound
We washed up in unknown lands filled with insurmountable demands
and crops to harvest for as far as the eye could see
I forgive your consternation and hesitation when we first met again
You had to relearn me: your queen, your lifetime
But we eventually celebrated with newfound shared language
and jumped-over brooms
Shaking off impending doom and sealing our brighter future together
I cooled your forehead and hand-fed you molasses and hot water cornbread
after a hard day’s work
And in turn, you kept me safe
sold yourself so that your family could remain whole
The whipping scars formed on your broad back
look like the mighty branches on our family tree
My life I owe to thee
remember that my love, please
You have been mine from the moment I saw you
Yet here we stand today, as strangers
with mountains of deafening silence between us
I no longer recognize the gaze you give in my direction
your face has been disfigured by society’s dereliction
So you drag your feet and medicate your restless mind in search of yourself
and in search of the reflection that your memory belongs to
In urban captivity and concrete jungles
your gentle spirit has succumb to the malevolent magic of their world
So behind the steel bars you keep your vulnerability concealed
but your faith still shines in that dark place:
where backs bleed ink from tattooed crosses
and hands pray on biceps for loves lost
where street preachers have flipped their robes for baggy clothes
and necks sag with the weight of Jesus dipped in gold
and your stories told may not be direct from the Bible
but still speak of salvation
My brotha, this is the byproduct of what happens when you have a nation
full of generations of unchained slaves with no reparations
But I still see you, my beloved Invisible Man
Please grab my hand
For I remember and love you for all that you really are
Your legacy and unborn children cry out for you
So in this purgatory place we remain prayerful and nostalgic –
patiently waiting for you to come back home
to once again promise us that we and us and you and me
will be yours
for a lifetime
© Copyright Cupid ‘n Cleopatra, 2011
Thank you for the opportunity to papticirate in the Year of the Tiger celebration. It was not only informative, and just down right fun, it was refreshing. I have meandered around the martial arts world for 35 plus years, at times, inspired and full enthusiasm, and at other times scratching my head. As a student and friend of John Ottenberg’s I would like to thank you for the oasis of clarity you have created at your school. I look forward to this new year and the opportunity to study with John and all those at Santa Cruz Martial Arts Academy.